How many hours are there between noon and six-o-clock? Don't you have to add a twelve or something?
”
— Girl C
“
I hate trying to think!
”
— Girl D
“
Everyone who isn't here raise your hand.
”
— Boy A
“
Nope! We're all here! Let's go!
”
— Boy B
If I don't pass this test, I am seriously fu***d! [turns around to find the teacher standing right behind him] Oh... um... I didn't know you were here!
— Boy B (I've never seen a face so red before. The teacher just smiled and shook his head.)
“
[runs into the door] Ow... My boob!
”
— Girl C, again. she forgot to turn the handle
Here's a rather funny incident. This is probably the cleverest trick I have ever seen someone pull off.
“
I'm going to put this tape over the camera. No one say anything!
”
— Boy B
The teacher and the rest of the class walk in. It takes a few minutes for anyone to notice anything.
“
Hey. What's wrong with the screen? There's a blurry spot.
”
— Boy C
“
What?
”
— The Teacher
He goes up to the camera. He discovers the tape.
“
There's tape here! Who put this on here? [Boy A's name] ! It was you wasn't it?
”
— The Teacher
“
No! It wasn't!
”
— Boy A
Yes it was. Just for that, you've got to turn in the assignment tomorrow. Everyone else turns it in at the regular time. Now come here and peel off this tape!
— The Teacher
“
What the hell!
”
— Boy A
“
[quietly] Heh, heh, heh, heehh!
”
— Boy B
Calculus class. Mega-sized assignments. There were three more work days left. Took him ten minutes to get the tape off. And Boy A never found out that the tape was placed there by Boy B. The rest us had no reason to inform either the teacher or Boy A of the details. We still are not sure if Boy B planned the whole thing or was just lucky. But it is likely that he did in fact plan it since it's usually Boy A doing all the stupid things. (Yes the test Boy B mentioned above was a calc test.)
If I didn't have clue what that word was, then very few others would. Changed.
”
— Matt
I had to change this. I know that it was a correct term. But "loves his chicks" sounds like the word is being used to refer to a "certain kind of female". It just was wrong in the wrong way.
— Matt
“
I think that using material from talented artists is preferable to just sitting on our butts and leaving crap...
”
— Matt
“
Dang it. I've got to slow down we I type.
”
— Matt
“
Attention: I have lost my brain!
”
— Matt
“
[After four or five edit conflicts] Can I respond at all here?
”
— Matt
“
I hate music notes and I knew that.
”
— Matt
“
Well I feel dumb.
”
— Matt
“
Ohhh ,balls. That was dumb of me.
”
— Matt
“
Sorry but I despise the word "albeit". Seems lazy to me.
”
— Matt
“
The word "albeit" means "although it be". Sounds pretty dumb anywhere.
”
— Matt
“
Ow,. Side. Pain. Ouch.. Ahh. My skull muscles! Please end the laughter!. The pain of the funny is too much!
”
— Matt
[Finds the words: "every single gay I own"] Whooa? How did that word show up? I must be tired. [Changed to : "every single game I own"]
— Matt
“
Du, du, duuu, dumb!
”
— Matt
“
The troll just complained about this. So I clarified.
”
— Matt
“
No, no, no. I wanted it to be hard to notice! This is good. heheheheheheeeeee!!!
”
— Matt
“
What does an undead skeleton do with money?
”
— Matt
“
Preview, Matt, you must preview.
”
— Matt
“
I'm fairly certain that the "of"'s need not be capitalized.
”
— Matt
“
Missing brain, please return if found.
”
— Matt
“
Fixed grammar, this entire article was one sentence!
”
— Matt
“
Me thinking thingy go bye. Me miss it.
”
— Matt
“
Brain, brain went away. I hope it comes back another day.
”
— Matt
“
Come back brain. I miss you.
”
— Matt
“
Nope. My brain is still missing. A reward is being offered for its return.
”
— Matt
“
Removed bad theory. Using this logic, Ganondorf must have regular sessions at tanning salons since his skin is so dark
”
— Matt
“
Removed bad theory. With this logic, the moon must be made of cheese since they both can look the same.
”
— Matt
“
?? How did you get here so fast. Do you have a homing beacon on your name or something?
Yeah, Anglo-Frisian dialects of Germanic settlers and Roman auxiliary troops from parts of what is today Germany :P :P :P
”
— Matt
“
I know that the human being and the fish can coexist peacefully.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
One of our goals is to setup democracies in foreign countries such as Germany.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
The vast majority of our imports come from outside the country.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
One word sums up probably the responsibility of any Governor, and that one word is ‘to be prepared’.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
It isn’t pollution that’s harming the environment. It’s the impurities in our air and water that are doing it.
”
— President George W. Bush
It is official. Our President is an idiot.
“
We have a firm commitment to NATO, we are a part of NATO. We have a firm commitment to Europe. We are a part of Europe.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
Throughout our history, the words of the Declaration have inspired immigrants from around the world to set sail to our shores. These immigrants have helped transform 13 small colonies into a great and growing nation of more than 300 people.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
I don't know where bin Laden is. I have no idea and really don't care. It's not that important. It's not our priority.
”
— President George W. Bush
“
If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator!
Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.
”
— President George W. Bush
Oh! That explains why the country is going to hell!
Various Star Wars Quotes
“
The ability to speak does not make you intelligent.
”
— Qui-Gon Jinn
“
Mine! Or I will help you not!
”
— Yoda
This is funny.
“
I've been had. General, I request permission to jump from an upper-story balcony, to ease my shame.